instant gratification

Since I clearly am in a no-nonsense mood, let’s not beat around the bush here. In a world where skin care products may take months to see an effect, sometimes you just don’t want to fuck around. Maybe you have a job interview, or a hot date, or maybe you have your period, feel like a bloated hemorrhaging pig, and want a little pick-me-up that doesn’t involve a bowl of brownie batter. Sometimes you just need a quick scrub or mask that you can count on — one that WORKS.

I have three no-fail options in my arsenal that I can rely on. All three result in baby-butt-smooth, soft, and glowing skin, and for once, all price points are represented. Let’s start at the top and work our way down.

Sunday Riley Good Genes Treatment, $105 + SR Ceramic Slip cleanser, $45 – Sunday Riley recommends 3 pumps of GG + 2 pumps of CS left on for 5-10 minutes as an impromptu mask. That’s a lot of product; I do 1-2 pumps of GG + 1 pump CS. I probably do this the most, because it’s fastest and easiest at end of a long day.

philosophy the microdelivery peel, $40 – don’t be thrown by the “peel” in the name; there is no physical peeling involved, of skin or product. This is a two-step process, starting with the granular Vitamin C scrub, followed by the lactic and salicylic acid activating gel, which results in some satisfying foaming action.

aspirin powder, $6 + honey – the aspirin comes in suspect little folded paper packets. I use one packet plus enough honey to make a paste and a little water to make it spreadable. Then I scrub this sticky goopy mess all over my face, adding extra layers to any zits or inflamed areas. Because this is concentrated anti-inflammatory goodness, I gravitate towards this concoction when I’m breaking out. (See: hemorrhaging menstrual pig and brownie batter, above.) You could do this with just water, but as it dries, the powder won’t stick very well — you’ve got to anchor it with some goopy base.

Now you tell me! What products or routines would you trust your first born with?

7 thoughts on “instant gratification

  1. DHC’s eye masks and their bio cellulose facial masks. Before it was trendy, I was into masks. I realized a while back that the value of masks doesn’t always come from the active ingredients of the “essence”, but the material used for the mask itself. The gel-like cellulose used in the DHC eye and facial masks are soothing because of the coolness (temperature, not mint action–being fragrance free) of the gel material. Also, cellulose means the fluid can’t escape before it’s absorbed by your skin, unlike paper sheet masks (which can be like wet paper towels on the face, Sparkle brand, not even Viva). Mind you, DHC does paper sheet masks, too. However, cellulose masks are the ones that allow me to quickly hide sleep deprivation, sinus-y eyes, and/or dehydrated skin.

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  2. LOVE the Good Genes ‘face mask’! Also a fan of ‘exfoliKate’ (although a little over hyped and over priced for what it does) my skin seems to respond better to it than a Clarisonic brush.
    Another favorite, even though this is a melt-your-face-off-and-light-your-britches-on-fire torture regime, when I am having occasional breakouts – usually from the gym (I ‘crossfit’ every day, and my skin does not thank me in the short term for that) – straight out of the shower, on a dry face while my pores are open, I dab on some good ol Retin-A (THE miracle of all miracles), then rub in 100% pure Tea Tree Oil (Radha Brand on Amazon), cry a lot, follow with 100% Rosehip Oil (Radha, Amazon), and then uselessly fan my face like I won a Miss America pageant … but that’s it! Wake up in the AM with practically or literally zero pimples, glowing, radiant skin, soft as that newborn butt.

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  3. Suti Facial Cleanser Balm (rediscovered, will never be forgotten again), and Pitta Facial Oil from a Spa here in Canada. That’s it. Oh, and suncreen… Josh Rosebrook or Coola these days.

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